


Forget To Remember

by dirkygoodness



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Heavily referenced slavery, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slavery, What if Anakin's time as a slave affected him more than the movies let us believe?, kind of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-26
Updated: 2016-04-26
Packaged: 2018-06-04 14:41:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6662905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dirkygoodness/pseuds/dirkygoodness
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The first time Anakin kisses Obi-Wan, his mind is so open Obi-Wan probably knew it was going to happen before he did it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Forget To Remember

**Author's Note:**

> uh... i'm not really sure what's going on here  
> and what's this?? am i trying to make a name for myself in the Obikin fandom?? four fics?? pfft if only
> 
>  
> 
> Sorry for inconveniences, misspellings, and any other mistakes I tried to fix as much as I could.

Sometimes, when there was nothing but the quiet of his own mind, Anakin remembered. He remembered that he was a slave, he remembered that he was just a thing to be bought and sold. All the while he knew he wasn't really that anymore, that it wasn't _who or what_ he was, yet the feelings were still there.

He still, even now, after becoming so strong already, had to stop himself from flinching away from someone who goes to touch him. He has to remind himself, that when someone raises their voice at him it doesn't mean pain or hurt.

It's not something that can just be unlearned, and really Anakin thinks he's probably going to always have days where he remembers. Days where it's hard to make himself get out of bed, hard to make himself be near other people.

And it's hard, to talk about it. About how he feels sometimes. He tries, tries explaining it to Obi-Wan. He didn't really say much, just muttered some broken sentences and groaned in frustration before stomping off.

He forgets sometimes, that he doesn't need words for Obi-Wan to understand.

The first time it happens is an accident. There's this man, someone big and imposing, and he's got that air of control around him.

Normally, Anakin would be fine with this, even maybe resentful – but it's a bad day, and Anakin almost punches the man when he tries to give him a pat on the back. Obi-Wan doesn't notice that part, not until later when Anakin apologizes for it, but he feels the emotions seep out of Anakin like water through sieve and he's ushering Anakin away so fast Anakin can't possess what he'd just done.

He feels stupid afterwards, for letting Obi-Wan hear all of that, but Obi-Wan never mentions it. He never mentions it, not one time. Not when Anakin trips going down the stairs and feels like he's about to be punished, not when he wants to vomit when he sees a girls choker necklace.

He started letting Obi-Wan in, even, when he's feeling like this. It's easier then trying to keep his mind locked up, when he's feeling so bad he wants to scream and hide. Anakin starts relying on what Obi-Wan will do, when he feels something off or he's having a bad day, remembering.

It's like Obi-Wan was his crutch, and the more he lets Obi-Wan feel the more Obi-Wan becomes more like a solid wall behind his back, holding him up.

The first time Anakin kisses Obi-Wan, his mind is so open Obi-Wan probably knew it was going to happen before he did it. But he doesn't shove Anakin away, even when Anakin cries into the kiss and holds onto him like he's the only thing holding him up.

Obi-Wan doesn't mention it, when Anakin comes home drunk and climbs into bed and sobs into his chest, all because he'd seen someone's raw and swollen wrists. Obi-Wan doesn't question Anakin, when he lets Obi-Wan in his head at random times of the day, silently begging for reassurance.

Obi-Wan never questions it. He just sends love through their bond and holds him, and when he can't hold him he sends even more love and adoration, and Anakin always holds onto that like a life line.

Anakin forgets sometimes, that he ever was a slave. He forgets what the cold bite of metal against his skin feels like and he forgets to be worried when someone raises their voice. It's not great, he has bad days.

But he's got Obi-Wan, always there to remind him that he's not a slave. He'll always have Obi-Wan, even if they're so far away from each other they can't hear each other anymore.

He forgets sometimes, that he traded in one kind of slavery for another.

 


End file.
